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Get Nothing And Like It

by Barclay Burns

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1.
He was never quite completely formed right Until she took his hand - like a war might He looked so deeply into her green eyes The car broke down outside of Van Nuys They took the exit for the Van Wyck Their chances burned up like Alan Stanwyk An errant pair of earrings went on the heir apparent's keyring And we all remember it being a weekend we remember very well Every precaution was taken not to die But the arms of time reached for them like eight octopi If you asked me what went wrong I'd admit I have no idea what went wrong
2.
Seeing you For the last time ever I broke, however briefly, from the lullaby of focus To an awakened state The kind that fades Like absolutely everything. I watched a single tree Sway in the cold wind Down the street as you retreated And I thought I’ll remember this Like I never do.
3.
There’s a pile of stuff by my bed that you left here There’s a book, and a shirt, and a record There’s a piece of my artwork you wanted On the nightstand’s a half-empty glass It’s on the side of the bed I don’t sleep on The shirt doesn’t fit me Should I throw it away? There’s a pile of stuff that we don’t agree on Like the moon, and the stars, and the planets I don’t care if Venus is rising I don’t think that food is medicine But I guess I could be wrong I have been known to be wrong I can’t believe that you’re gone I am still here, at a loss When the buses go by at night Their lights shine so bright through my window And for a second, I believe That the moon is causing my problems
4.
Sometimes my eyes just water Solid wooden heart Like when you put the car in neutral In service of something larger It’s obscured the more important part Press the mute button, the sounds cut out Now everything is getting harder Getting harder just to start Solid wooden heart Sometimes my hands just shake Frozen-over lake In the ceiling of clouds I’m waiting Perfect ecosystem sealed in Put it all to sleep for now Until it thaws out, and I crawl out Reflect the light away It gets quiet all at once Painted-over rust Heatless, lightless sun January dusk I’m waiting…
5.
The thing about it, when you think about it No one knows what it’s for Soldiers in an unpopular war But if I buy that suit You can bury me in it And if I wear that suit (just one day) You can bury me in it Overseas…
6.
Blue Ever navy blue Tossed upon the sea The ship a ghost Tending to its wake Unnamed Every single day It calls you Grey Ever-changing grey
7.
Nightmare I remember seven years later All those pioneers died alone and in the woods Last time I was warm was in the womb I have a hundred thousand pictures of empty rooms Take me way the fuck out on the train Tangentially related, but yet to be explained Lying in wait like trains in rail yards File it all away like jail bars
8.
Candle burns down and winks out The wick soaked in wax I don’t feel like anything. A thousand pieces laid out on the table Gears and springs I can’t fix anything Let’s save everything Dead batteries and whales Everything I don’t care how it turns out How this goes, or that I don’t feel like anything A thousand scenes have all played out And I was made to watch Now I’m not scared of anything
9.
Wrap myself in warm black clothes Gotta put food on the table Gotta keep meat on my bones I’m not naive enough to wish you were here Beat me to the punch Punch me to the beat Posthumous release I gave up on love I gave it a permanent back seat Beat my body up Bloody up my face Now my eyes don’t blink I stare into space I’m smiling always and always Acid looks exchanged on cold streets Keep it moving along There’s nothing to see here I squared everything, my balance is zero Each mistake just once Once is all it takes Watch me be the one I don’t miss it It was just taking up space
10.
Well you know me better than anyone And you know I’ve never been young Never been young You’re bringing me down I’m bringing you down We’re bringing us down You can roll your eyes with the best of em And you know the laughter will come The laughter will come We came out of the winter Out of winter to spring And everything got sharper But I stayed dull And I’ve never been young Well you know me better than anyone And you know the laughter will come The laughter will come I knew that you would tire of me But I walked from the highway Into the trees And I haven’t been seen since
11.
When the wind walls everyone in And the sun dies The trees choked out by vines So what if we know the rules, we don’t understand This is where we’re at This is where we’ve been I don’t have all day You don’t want to hurt me You know that I backed down when you backed out
12.
I’m gone now, five miles off the lighthouse Closing my hands on themselves I withdraw my complaints Open and shut my eyes The planet fades off in a curve All wheels turn. I sense a reluctance to speak What are you reading into these days? If I paved the streets I’d get to rename them In a small house by the sea Where the hands of clocks can’t reach The lunar beach at night Ancient engine cough to life Waves goodbye waves

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Recorded January 2015 at Time To Operate in Greenpoint, Brooklyn by Jon Davies.

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released August 31, 2016

Barclay - drums, bass, guitar, vocals

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Barclay Burns Brooklyn, New York

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